Leaving it to the End

This post is solely based on this tweet on life lessons from watering plants. When I’m watering plants using a bucket and mug(too broke to procure a hose, the tube kind FYKI), I usually end up having more water for the last pot. This can be brushed aside as a classic case of miscalculation of the actual quantity of water after which I need to turn off the tap. However, the next tweet from this person, probably inspired by the reply to me went like this.

Got me thinking about the way I have managed to do things all this while, leaving the important sweeter, happier, tastier(ahem ahem, NOT A TWSS bait) things to the end. I usually leave the meat pieces for the last because I just love having them without any bread or rice. Or tapioca. I do the same with pickles too, but that’s because I’ve never figured out how they enhance the flavour of a meal. In my not so humble opinion, they simply push every other flavour into obscurity. Except the Cut Mango Pickle that my mom makes.

Anyway, leaving it to the end. It not only keeps you worried about whether your friend, or in the case of food, foe will steal snatch it away.

So much for saving for the future. Also, enough food for thought. For now.

I like my Fraand’s creation

Level Headed Idiot asks Govt to Ban A Level Headed Idiot’s Blog for Blasphemous Content

In an interesting turn of events, Level Headed Idiot has asked the Government to ban A Level Headed Idiot’s Blog for hosting blasphemous content which could ignite communal tension. Level Headed Idiot requested the government to do so because he was sure that the content on his blog was offensive to a lot of people.

“The content on this blog is very passionate and full of malicious intent. I wish that no one reads this.”, the author said when asked about the reason for such a decision. He also added that he has already talked to technology giants like Google and Facebook to take off his content from their servers. Both organizations commented that while it is entirely possible to remove the content on request of an individual, it would be against their principles of privacy to completely remove any content, which might appear removed to the end user.

It was pointed out to the author that the blog has been around for more than two years and no one had said a word about the issues with it. The author said, “I am really offended by what I read on my blog. That means that there is a need to ban it. It doesn’t matter what the rest of the country or the world thinks about it”. One journalist present asked the author to stop blogging in that case. However, he counter argued that he had nothing better to do when he ran out of options on how to waste time. He also confirmed that this had nothing to do with the upcoming elections, even though no one asked him about it.

However, Level Headed Idiot’s alter ego issued a press release later in the day and it read thus:

My brain’s other half has gone completely insane. He is an attention seeking W#0&3 and did all this for publicity. You and I know that no one gives two hoots about his lame blog and even if they did, the worst they would do is pull their own tongues and commit suicide instead of going out and outraging about it. He is completely bonkers and wants more attention than some people whom he thinks, get more attention than they actually deserve due to their contacts as well as the “you rub my back, I’ll rub yours” policy. Deep inside, he is also jealous that he is not even 1% as talented as most of the people, whose work he sees all the time. Above all, he is always making failed attempts to come off as an intelligent person and this ban, he thinks, will make the public realize his intellect.

I want to meet…

• The first person to use his mobile phone while driving. And kick his butt. If he is alive, of course.
• The first person to tie a string at two ends and strum it and realize that it could make music.
• The first person who decided to take an egg, put it on the pan while stirring it constantly and introduced the world to the awesomeness that is scrambled eggs.
• The first person to start a pointless conversation. And repeat the things I mentioned in bullet #1.
• The first person to convene a meeting. And buy back all the time I have lost.
• The first person to kick a round thing and tell the world that a beautiful game could be played.
• The first person to take care of an animal and showed that a pet could be the most amazing thing in the world.
• The first person to take meat and a few ingredients and create magic out of them.

Those that should be nuked

Disclaimer : I strongly oppose nuclear warfare. However, I strongly feel that we can do with it for the following types of people. Even though nuclear waste renders a place inhabitable, the number of people gone from the world if we use the list for nuke attacks is so much that we can do with very little area to live.

• The ones that talk with toothpaste froth in their mouths
• The ones who keep the tap running while brushing their teeth or shaving their face
• The ones who praise a thing at first, only to go on and always find faults with the same things after a few days
• The liars
• The ones that keep their houses clean by throwing garbage onto the road and then whine about the disease causing filth, while sitting in the confines of their AC cars
• The ones that correct you even when they know that you are exaggerating
• The ones that talk behind others’ backs
• The ones that do not respect others’ time